Time apart

There was a time long ago that my partner and I were inseperable. We wanted to be with eachother at all times. It was painful to be apart, a few days seemed like an eternaty. I would well up with tears as she left the house to go visit a friend for a few days, thinking how much I was going to miss her. How could we be apart? How could I sleep in our bed without her breathing next to me? Every moment apart felt like an eternity. I would despriately try to find something to fill my time with while she was away. I would busy myself with housework, friends, extra hours at work. I could never just sit back and enjoy having the house to myself.

Now after ten years together and some difficult times we have come to the reolization that some time apart every now and then is healthy. Having friends that we can enjoy the company of without eachother is healthy.
Today I will be taking my partner to her friends in Grand Bend, where she will be staying until the weekend. In past history for a few days before a trip like this I would feel needy and clingy, I would feel the need to suck up all the love and attention I could get from my partner before she were to leave. Today I would be emotional, it would feel almost like loss, like she was going forever even though I knew logically it was only for a few days. Now I joke about it, last night we were laying in bed and I turned to my partner and said (sarcasticly) "you are LEAVING me! Forever!" And we laugh. She comes back with "you are right, I am running away to Grand Bend and never comeing back... So your coming to pick me up on Saturday?" We laugh some more.

It is nice to no longer feel that insecurity, to be able to enjoy my time alone. I have to work everyday that she is away but on Wednesday I have a work function in the evening, on Thursday I am going to dinner with some friends and Friday I will just spend my evening here at home reading and relaxing. I will miss my partner when she is away, I like to come home to her beautiful face each night. I like to hear her voice before I drift off to sleep, etc. But missing her is different now than it used to be, it is no longer a desperate feeling. No longer does a few days feel like an eternaty without her. The time will pass and before I know it she will be back home and her voice will be the last thing I hear before drifting off to sleep.

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